| “ | One of the greatest frustrations surgeons have are the unrealistic expectations of our patients. Whether they're acutely ill or they've been sick for years, by the time they're on the surgical table, they're hoping for a miracle. But often, surgery is just the beginning of the healing rather than an end. Because for weeks or months post-op, people have to learn to live without the part of their body we've just removed. And that's not always easy and it's never painless. So surgery is not the happily ever after our patients hope it will be. Like everything else in life, it's an evolution. I've flown rockets and slain dragons. I've saved lives and I've had my life saved. I've saved lives and I've had my life saved. I've been through broken bones and a broken home and the death of people I love, but I'm still here. I never chose the safety of what was known when there was the possibility of more to be discovered. I've had adventures that most people only dream about. And I've had losses that I still dream about. And if there's one thing I've learned in all my adventures, it's that there's no such thing as a life lived happily ever after. Unless the happily means simply that we're still alive, that the sun is rising on another day. Because with every sunrise comes the possibility of happiness and also the possibility of heartache. And sometimes, it's all rolled in together. I came to understand as a very young child that when the imagination is limitless, life's possibilities are endless. But I learned that the hard way. I learned it through yearning and frustration and ache and longing and sometimes desperation for a life different from the one I was living. I learned to stretch my imagination and spread my wings and allow for all the options life had to offer. Not only the ones I could see with my eyes. I stretched for the ones I could feel with my heart. As long as the sun rises on your life, there will be new dragons to slay. So the end of my story is not any kind of ever after. Because I'm still alive. I'm still here. And the sun still rises on my life. | ” |
I'll Follow the Sun is the seventh episode and mid-season premiere of the nineteenth season and the 407th overall episode of Grey's Anatomy.
Short Summary[]
It's Meredith's last day at Grey Sloan Memorial and the doctors plan a goodbye surprise, while Nick confronts her about the future of their relationship. Elsewhere, the interns compete to scrub in on Maggie and Winston's groundbreaking partial heart transplant procedure, and Richard asks Teddy an important question.
Full Summary[]
Mika is brushing her teeth as she packs her bag in her van. Her van is towed. She climbs out and watches it being towed away.
Simone is dropped off at the hospital by her sister, Ebony. They share a tense goodbye. Mika and Simone race each other.
Meredith and her kids arrive on her last day at the hospital. Bailey and Ellis take off to give their old daycare teachers gift. Zola stays behind as Maggie and Amelia catch up. Amelia is enjoying her new place but she feels grown up living alone. Zola wants to watch a surgery. Maggie has an exciting one.
Jo finds Link, who has the day off to catch up on charting. Jo needs him to pick up Meredith's favorite cake for her goodbye party. Jo can't go herself since a baby that she delivered is having heart surgery today and his parents are attached to her. She calls on Link's love for her to get him to agree.
Levi tells the interns that they are all rounding with Maggie and Winston, who are making history today. Mika and Simone arrive late. Levi says Taryn Helm was also not punctual despite being a great surgeon, yet she's now bartending across the street. Levi urges them all to look after their mental health as to not end up like Helm.
After consent from Arlo's parents, the interns join Jo, Maggie, and Winston in the NICU. Arlo was born with a truncus arteriosus and VSD. Two-weeks-old Arlo has been on ECMO since a week and awaiting a transplant. There was a donor heart yesterday but the procurement team reported the heart muscle was too weak. Winston and Maggie believe that they can only transplant the two major arteries. This is the first-ever partial heart transplant. It could take months to find another heart and if it works, he won't need any additional surgeries since his native heart will grow with him. Meadow, Arlo's mother, understands her son will die if the surgery doesn't work. Maggie says they'll give her some time to think about it. The parents request that Jo stay with them.
Nick drops by Meredith's office while she's packing up. He heard it was her last day. He went to the house, which has been stabilized but still reeks of smoke. Zola is excited to start at her new school. Meredith knows that Nick has called but she's had a lot on her plate with the fire and the move to Boston. He wonders if her plan was to move across the country without a conversation after he moved to Seattle for her. Meredith says she told him she loved him in this very room and he didn't say it back. She had hoped they would have picked up where they left off when he took the job, but he apparently wanted to take things slow. Thus, it did not occur to her to confer with him about the move to Boston. Nick asks if she's putting all the blame on him for not sticking to her timeline. Nick can't do this. He leaves.
Maggie and Winston explain the procedure to the interns, which Benson likens to stripping a house without disturbing the frame. His language appals Mika and Winston. The attendings says one intern will get to observe at the table; the one who performs the best vascular anastomosis in the skills lab. The interns rush off but Winston asks Benson to stay. He asks him not to do his finger agility exercises in front of the patients, like he did in the NICU this morning. Benson explains he does so to disengage from the emotionality. Maggie deems it smart but asks him not to let the patients see it.
Teddy asks Richard about the search for a new Chief. They are sorting through a lot of interesting applicants, though it used to be easier when the hospital was at its peak. Teddy says it's not easy to step in as an insider with all of the hospital's history and suggests finding someone close. Not picking up on her subtle application, he invites her to be part of the search committee.
Meadow and Will have decided to wait for another heart. Jo stresses it could take months, though Meadow is hopeful it could happen. Jo says Maggie is the best and truly believes it'll save Arlo's life. She's not doing this for prestige. Meadow insists she does not feel comfortable with this experimental procedure.
The interns are working on their vascular anastomosis in the skills lab. Mika is struggling and leaves. Simone gives Lucas some pointers, getting close to him to show him how to twist his wrist. The two of them are paged to the ER for Tessa Hobbes.
Levi awaits Simone and Lucas in the ER by Tessa's bed. She's experiencing abdominal pain and is a bit hypotensive. She picked up her groceries instinctively, despite not being allowed to lift any loads for three months after her surgery. She felt like something tore and then drove herself here. Lucas thinks they should take her straight to the OR but since she's hemodynamically stable, Levi says they can do a CT first. He'll call ahead.
Mika arrives in the bar and asks Taryn if she's Dr. Helm. Taryn says she's no longer a doctor. Mika is desperate for a win in this contest so she can join in on a partial heart transplant on a newborn. Taryn says there is no such thing. Mika is homeless and exhausted and she needs a reason to keep caring. If Blue wins, she cannot stand the gloating. Taryn hates the nickname and agrees to help her if Mika will be her barback Friday night. Taryn starts showing her.
As Lucas and Simone get her settled on the CT machine, Tessa explains she give in to her food cravings to celebrate. She didn't even think about picking the groceries up from the stoop. Tessa then notices the ring on Simone's necklace. Simone confirms she was engaged but now she's not. They agree heartbreak is the worst. Tessa says she needs her purse. Lucas will get it.
Meredith and Nick arrive in the CT boot. Meredith sends the interns to book an OR. As they await the images, Nick comments that all of this happened because of groceries. Meredith is sure she didn't do it on purpose. Tessa lives alone, is set in her ways, and it's a lot to change and ask for help. Tessa admits she's afraid of dying. She still has more to say. The images reveal a severe abdominal bleeding.
Maggie and Amelia discuss Maggie's marriage. She's not sure if she and Winston are better but they came up with the partial heart transplant idea together. They work really well together within their chosen area of expertise. Some things were said the day of the fire but they haven't really talked since. Maggie is sure they'll talk again after they make medical history. Jo comes up to inform them that Meadow wants to call off the procedure. Maggie finds it unethical to go and try to convince her. Amelia wants to talk to Meadow.
Amelia and Jo are talking with Meadow and Will as Maggie waits outside the NICU. Amelia talks about her anencephalic son. She gave birth to him knowing he would be an organ donor since there was no surgery they could try. She thinks about Christopher a lot because watching his brother grow up makes her think about how Christopher would have been. If there had been any hope for Christopher, she would have taken that shot.
Once Meredith and Nick are done scrubbing in, Simone and Lucas start scrubbing. He knew they should have taken her up to the OR right away. His gut doesn't lie and he should have fought for it.
Winston judges the work of the interns. He likes Mika's the best. Mika tells Benson they'll call him "Red" today.
Maggie and Winston get gowned and gloved. They are about to operate on Arlo.
As they make the first incision, up in the gallery, Benson tells Jules he thought she would win. Her stitches are excellent. Jules tanked the contest because babies scare her. As a five-year-old, her father called her out into the backyard where her mother had just given birth to her brother in a kiddy pool. He had her cut the umbilical cord. The warzone that is childbirth has traumatized her. Zola shushes them and urges them to focus on Maggie making history.
As Maggie and Winston calmly work on the heart transplant, Meredith and Nick rush to stop Tessa's bleeding. Tessa flatlines. Meredith starts compressions. After a while, she lets Simone take over. Meanwhile, Arlo's heart starts beating in his chest after the doctors take him off bypass. Maggie and Winston smile at their success. Eventually, Simone is told to stop. Tessa is pronounced dead at 12:21. The interns stay behind to close the incision while Meredith and Nick leave the OR.
In the scrub room, Nick says that was a stupid end to Tessa's story. He hates everything about this day. So does Meredith. Nick says he's trained to wait for organs to pink up as a transplant surgeon. That takes time. Humans are not machines with an on/off switch. Meredith says she's a grown woman with a big life and career and three kids. Her daughter needs this move. She wants Nick in her life if he wants to be in it but if she has to choose, she's picking herself and her children. She won't beg him to love her.
Simone finds Meredith outside and apologizes for getting emotional earlier. She tells Simone to be sorry when she stops feeling the losses. Meredith is disappointed that her last surgery here ended like this. Simeone understands it's devastating on every level. Meredith asks Simone about her grandmother. Simone says she keeps calling her Denise, which is triggering for her sister, who always figured that Simone killed their mother. She has never forgiven Simone for it. Simone has no clue why she's telling this to the Chief. Meredith says because she knows she understands. Also, she doesn't work here anymore so she can call her Meredith. Simone then reveals she has Tessa's last book. When Tessa felt the pain, she went and saved her book onto a thumb drive, which Simone has with her. Tessa's publisher is in Boston so Simone figured Meredith could take it. Meredith is glad that Tessa got to finish her final story. It makes her emotional. Simone repeats Meredith's advice back to her.
Mika and Jo are checking on Arlo. The heart is pumping well, completely on its own. Amelia is glad that it worked. Maggie thanks her. She tears up as she leaves the NICU. All cardiac testing looks perfect, exhilarating Maggie and Winston. They take in the miracle. Mika appears and tells them what happened today was beyond her wildest imagination. Today was awful because her house van got towed with her entire life in it. The attendings are surprised she sleeps in a van. She won't tonight since she can't afford to get it out of impound. Anyway, she thanks them for today.
Lucas catches up with Amelia and asks her how she manages to not care about what others think, which is what his mother and aunts have told him. They sound a little jealous of that. He wanted to fight for his gut feeling today but didn't because he was worried about getting in trouble. Amelia says she cares deeply but does what she thinks is right anyway. She learned that the hard way. She had a whole life before she became that person. Lucas says a woman lost her life because he didn't fight. Amelia says the pain will encourage him to fight in the future. She then checks if he ever found a place to live. He moved into a hostel with a roach problem.
Jo sees Link carrying a big box from the bakery. It's so much bigger than she expected. They check the cake and find it's for Melvin's bar mitzvah. There's no time to take it back.
The hospital staff gathers in the decorated lobby for Meredith's goodbye toast. Jo and Link have done their best to change the writing to "Happy Meredith." A surprised Bailey refrains from commenting. Teddy finds Richard and says she was top of her class in high school and medical school, she completed her fellowship at Mayo, then she came here to train Cristina Yang. She has an incredible pedigree and she's insulted by the fact that Richard wouldn't consider offering her the job. Richard says the hospital just comes out of a shutdown. Bailey and Meredith, who have similar pedigree, both quit the job. It's a flailing program with a huge amount of stress. If she wants the job, it's hers. Teddy needs time to think about it. Meredith walks into the crowd without anyone noticing. They quickly cheer "Surprise!". Everyone takes a glass of cider and toasts Meredith. Bailey says Meredith grew up to become one of her greatest points of pride. She can't finish her speech. Richard says the place won't be the same without her. Meredith spins around to look at all of her friends and colleagues. Everyone raises their glass to her. Zola tells Meredith that Maggie was amazing. Maggie asks Meredith if she talked to Nick. She did but they have a plane to catch. Meredith hugs her sisters and takes off with her kids.
Taryn is surprised to see Nick at the bar as is he to see her behind the bar. She is living her best life. He says it was a rough day and orders a whiskey. Taryn is confused as she thought Meredith's goodbye party is happening now. She won't pretend to respect his awful decision-making. Meredith is impossible and perfect and selfish, but she has earned that right. Meredith fell in love with him and yet, he is somehow here rather than with her. He is really stupid.
Outside the NICU, Winston and Maggie watch Will and Meadow. Maggie calls it a miracle of science, which can save thousands of lives. She is sure this has made him realize he can't change his field at this stage of his career. Winston recalls she told him she didn't respect him and it's been a lot with the fire. He has been waiting for an apology but now she's doubling down. She believes it's more than a job. It's a gift. Winston says she called Benson's disengaging decision smart. She is cold. So the feeling of disrespect is mutual.
Nick arrives in the lobby where Bailey is enjoying the cake. Bailey now knows she wanted to say Meredith was one of a kind. Meredith already took off for the airport. Nick runs out.
Nick driving to the airport but there is heavy traffic. Meanwhile, Meredith and her kids start boarding. Nick realizes he'll never make it. Meredith and her kids find their seats. Nick pulls over. Meredith tells her kids she got an advance copy of the final Tessa book. She answers Nick's call. He tells her he loves her. He fell in love with her the first day they met and then again the second day. He has loved her every minute of every day that he's known her. Meredith struggles to answer. She says she'll call him when they get settled and hangs up.
Meredith is reading the Tessa book to her children.
Maggie catches up with Amelia and asks if she can stay at her place tonight.
Benson and Jules are making out in an on-call room.
Lucas arrives outside Meredith's house with his bags. Moments later, Simone arrives, too. Meredith gave Simone the key and told her she could stay there if she was willing to oversee the repair of the roof. Amelia gave Lucas a key and told him the same thing. Simone says her relationship ended when she was kicked out of her residency. She does feel things but she doesn't want to put Lucas through any kind of rebound situation. Lucas could be down for a rebound. As long as they are honest, there's no harm done. Simone says they apparently live together, which seems a terrible idea. They laugh a bit and enter the house. They look around. Simone says it's amazing. She and Lucas share a look, which is interrupted by the arrival of Mika. Maggie gave her a key. Simone and Lucas show her their keys. They agree to order pizza.
Meredith finishes reading the book. Ellis and Bailey have fallen asleep. The final words of the book describe how Tessa's life will go on with new challenges ahead, a sentiment that echoes with Meredith as she looks around the plane, on her way to the next chapter of her own life.
Cast[]
Main Cast[]
- Ellen Pompeo as Dr. Meredith Grey
- Chandra Wilson as Dr. Miranda Bailey
- James Pickens, Jr. as Dr. Richard Webber
- Kevin McKidd as Dr. Owen Hunt
- Caterina Scorsone as Dr. Amelia Shepherd
- Camilla Luddington as Dr. Jo Wilson
- Kelly McCreary as Dr. Maggie Pierce
- Kim Raver as Dr. Teddy Altman
- Jake Borelli as Dr. Levi Schmitt
- Chris Carmack as Dr. Atticus Lincoln
- Anthony Hill as Dr. Winston Ndugu
- Alexis Floyd as Dr. Simone Griffith
- Harry Shum Jr. as Dr. Benson "Blue" Kwan
- Adelaide Kane as Dr. Jules Millin
- Midori Francis as Dr. Mika Yasuda
- Niko Terho as Dr. Lucas Adams
- Scott Speedman as Dr. Nick Marsh
Guest Stars[]
- Jaicy Elliot as Dr. Taryn Helm
- Patricia Richardson as Tessa Hobbes
- Michael Steger as Will Fischer
- Sharmita Bhattacharya as Meadow Fischer
- Aniela Gumbs as Zola Grey Shepherd
- Cloteal L. Horne as Ebony Griffith
Co-Starring[]
Medical Notes[]
Arlo Fischer[]
- Diagnosis:
- Truncus arteriosis
- Ventricular septal defect
- Doctors:
- Maggie Pierce (cardiothoracic surgeon)
- Winston Ndugu (cardiothoracic surgeon)
- Mika Yasuda (surgical intern)
- Jules Millin (surgical intern)
- Benson Kwan (surgical intern)
- Simone Griffith (surgical intern)
- Lucas Adams (surgical intern)
- Treatment:
- ECMO
- Partial heart transplant
Arlo, two weeks, was born with truncus arteriosis and ventricular septal defect. He was placed on the transplant list. A week after his birth, he was put on ECMO. A heart transplant became available, but the procurement team determined the heart muscle was weak and not suitable for transplant. Maggie and Winston believed they would take part of the house and repair Arlo's heart. If it worked, the valves would grow with him and he wouldn't require additional transplants. The interns were told whoever did the best vascular anastomosis in the skills lab would be allowed to scrub in to observe. The surgery was briefly called off when his parents decided they didn't want to take the risk and wanted to wait for a full transplant instead, but after Amelia talked to them about her experience with her own son, they changed their minds and the surgery went forward. It was successful.
Tessa Hobbes[]
- Diagnosis:
- Doctors:
- Meredith Grey (general surgeon)
- Nick Marsh (general surgeon)
- Levi Schmitt (surgical resident)
- Lucas Adams (surgical intern)
- Simone Griffith (surgical intern)
- Treatment:
- Surgery
Tessa came into the ER with abdominal pain after picking up her groceries. She said it felt like something had torn. They took her to CT. Nick wanted to take her directly to surgery, but Levi said she needed a CT first. They had Meredith paged as they took her for her CT. The CT showed catastrophic bleeding and she was rushed into surgery. In surgery, she coded and despite their best efforts, she died at 12:21.
Music[]
| Song | Performer | Scene |
|---|---|---|
| "Feeling Alright" | Kayiah |
|
| "Hey Love" | JG Daydream |
|
| "Let It Be Hope" | Lxandra |
|
| "Run Away to Mars" | TALK |
|
| "Chasing the Light" | Valerie Broussard |
|
| "Living In the Lost" | Jeremy Lister |
|
| "Nocturnal" | Electric Midnight |
|
Notes and Trivia[]
- This episode's title originated from the song I'll Follow the Sun, originally sung by The Beatles.
- This episode scored 3.60 million viewers.[1]
- This episode marks Ellen Pompeo's last on screen appearance as Meredith Grey for the season until the season finale.[2] Trailers and other promotional material for the episode branded the episode "Meredith's Farewell to Seattle".
Gallery[]
Episode Stills[]
Poster[]
Quotes[]
- Mika: I need a win because I don't have anywhere to sleep tonight, and Seattle is outrageously expensive, and being a surgical resident is exhausting to the point of nearly impossible, and I just really need to give myself a reason to keep caring. And if Blue wins, I cannot take the gloating.
- Taryn: Blue?
- Mika: Like the ribbon. And this is a nickname he perpetuates.
- Taryn: Wow. That is arrogant.
- Mika: Right?
- Taryn: 20 bucks.
- Mika: My house was towed this morning, so I don't have bucks. But if I win this contest, I will barback for you on Friday night for free. You've been a barback?
- Taryn: No, but I've been a cater waiter and I'm excellent at chopping limes.
- Winston: This is all good work. Number one's sutures are particularly precise. But with perfect alignment and tension, the winner is number three.
- Mika: That's me! Guess we gotta call you Red today, huh?
- Maggie: It's a miracle of science, Winston. Specifically, it's a miracle of cardiothoracic surgery. We did a thing that no one else has done today, and we saved that baby's life. And if it worked like I think it did, this miracle of science is going to save thousands of babies' lives. That has to make you see that you can't just change your field of study at this stage of your career.
- Winston: You told me that you didn't respect my choice, you said you didn't respect me.
- Maggie: I didn't say that.
- Winston: And then there was a fire. You know, it was a lot. I gave you time, and I gave you space, but for two weeks now, I've been waiting for an apology that hasn't come. And now you're doubling down? There's no apology coming because you meant what you said?
- Maggie: I think you'll reconsider...
- Winston: Yeah, changing my job to protect my marriage.
- Maggie: It's not a job. It's not a job. It is a gift.
- Winston: Alright. And just like that, the feeling is mutual.
- Maggie: What feeling?
- Winston: You told Kwan that his strategy to disengage emotionally from his patients was smart.
- Maggie: What feeling?
- Winston: All this time, I don't know how I missed it.
- Maggie: Winston, what feeling?
- Winston: The disrespect. You're cold. And I don't respect it.
- Taryn: You are such an idiot.
- Nick: Wow.
- Taryn: I don't work there anymore, so I'm just gonna tell you the truth instead of pretending to respect your awful decision making. She's Meredith Grey. She's impossible, and she's perfect, and she's brilliant, and she cares. And she can be mean sometimes, but only when she needs to be, and she can be selfish sometimes because she has earned that right. And for some stupid reason she's into men so she nevfell in love with me, but she fell in love with you. And you're here? How stupid are you?
See Also[]
|
A complete overview of this episode's crew can be found here. |
| Grey's Anatomy Season 19 | ||||||
| #01 | "Everything Has Changed" | #08 | "All Star" | #15 | "Mama Who Bore Me" | |
| #02 | "Wasn't Expecting That" | #09 | "Love Don't Cost a Thing" | #16 | "Gunpowder and Lead" | |
| #03 | "Let's Talk About Sex" | #10 | "Sisters Are Doin' It for Themselves" | #17 | "Come Fly With Me" | |
| #04 | "Haunted" | #11 | "Training Day" | #18 | "Ready to Run" | |
| #05 | "When I Get to the Border" | #12 | "Pick Yourself Up" | #19 | "Wedding Bell Blues" | |
| #06 | "Thunderstruck" | #13 | "Cowgirls Don't Cry" | #20 | "Happily Ever After?" | |
| #07 | "I'll Follow the Sun" | #14 | "Shadow of Your Love" | |||
| << Season 18 | Season 20 >> | |||||
References[]
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